Initially I had mutura as the title for this post. That
would have suggested that it is about the famous Kenyan tripe sausage delicacy
but not at all. Even back in the day, I always had a problem with insha and
composition titles (to this day it seems) so I used random words and sentences-
I can imagine the look on my former English teacher if he’s reading this…. “So,
this bugger used to write ‘whatever’ as a title just for the fuck of it?” Ok,
maybe he wouldn’t curse but he was always an angry fella.
Mutura is somewhere in this post though…
just read along.
STOP the press (and social media too) because I have news!!
When I was younger, the received wisdom was that once you
were over 40, you’d be stuck in your ways for life. Over the last couple of
days, it’s like I’ve been stuck at a certain age (1960s and 70s there around).
Folk tunes, oldies, UB40 and Gregory Isaacs samples are some of the records I
play on repeat every day. These tunes have tugged my ear and I kopp every
record I can lay my hands on. Now Playing ‘When I’m 64’ by UB40 as I write
this.
I only patronize ‘local’ pub to chug my favorite froth and
quite frankly I can’t remember the last time I went out dancing. No more pub
crawl and hanging out in night clubs for me (at least for now). A sure fire way
to always end up in the wrong shit is hanging out in night clubs till devil
hours. Prinsloo is an example (read my earlier post). I remember leaving home
the other day when my little sister said to me, “Kim,na leo umekaa ka Mbaba!”
When I got out the door I took out my wallet to check my I.D… Lawd!
My friend reassured me that I’m not getting old…. “It’s
called Nostalgia”, she said.
Nyama and tusker have
always been my favorite diet. IMO, tusker lager is the best thing since
sandwiches and inter racial porn. Occasionally, I’d recommend corona extra with
lime if you want light beer and to convince your visiting mom that is soda
stocked in the fridge.
So every day I find my way to ‘local’ pub & butchery…..
Watch news (during the 7 o’clock bulletin it is quiet since patrons are still
sober so at least one can listen. By 9 pm, they’ve turned into political
pundits and yell things like “Kibaki’s recent cabinet reshuffle stinks three
ways to Sunday!!! Was jakom consulted? Did you know that the letter was cc’ed
to Kenyatta?”), eat as I sip my lager and listen to the fish-cake stories of
the old patrons. I should tweet Julie Gichuru to suggest some political
analysts for Sunday Live (I see David Makali and Kipchumba Murkomen losing
their jobs- my ‘muzungu’ colleague pronounces the name as ‘Murk Omen’- Dunno if
he ever realizes how that comes off).
After the fourth bottle, when I start ‘feeling’ (don’t laugh
so hard, I have a low tolerance level) it ‘shows’ me mutura. Kenyan tripe sausage and goat soup is one delicacy I always
penda whenever I get drunk. Restaurants make it real nice for you too, so try
HashmiBBQ, best barbecue place. Goat soup laced with ‘pilipili’ is good for
hangover … Old Kenyatta himself used to like thupu (Not to say that he was a drink person)-Nostalgia? Or old age
for me-no? Don’t know if he loved his tusker as well but who doesn’t? _?. I
haven’t the foggiest idea how to fix my meals so I eat out often, which can be
expensive. Bummer!!(That’s a 70s word I like using-“old”, I can almost hear you
say) *adding cooking lessons to my to-do-list*/ or I could just get a raise at
work and keep enriching ‘local’ pub? On the upside, I get my thupu everyday
Then it gets late and I have to be home since it’s a
weekday. If I haven’t finished my beer yet the bartender allows me to take it
to go. “Hiyo utaamkia asubuhi breakfast, ukienda works,” he says (Don’t judge,
I practice consequentialist theory anyway-based on personal desires, the theory
renders different approaches to life as being equivalent, thus the life of a
student who gets drunk every night is as admirable as that of a student who
works hard for a scholarship if both follow their desire).
Did I mention how much I penda this beer???
I’m sure you have
your own theory. My ‘nostalgic’ evenings always leave me heading home with a happy
sigh.
It’s supper time BTW- I could eat the absolute pants off
some tripe sausage right about now!! (I know…..I know, I’m tripping balls with
this mutura but you have to admit
that it’s thoroughly delicious)
